Best Penny (Hofstadter) Quotes

Good morning everybody, hope you’re all well! I celebrated my birthday this Sunday just gone, I got some lovely presents from my family that I was not expecting to get and also had a facetime with my sister and nephew which made the day extra special…as another little treat we’re going to be visiting them this weekend which we’re looking forward to, especially before my mum’s pre-op appointment next week, as there are bound to be a lot of laughs watching Isaac doing his thing and hearing all the stories on what has happened this week.

Anyway on with today’s post and the sixth and penultimate edition of The Big Bang Theory; Best Character Quotes, featuring Penny…With a show consisting primarily of male protagonists, Penny stood out from the beginning. It wasn’t until the show was a few seasons in that another female character was added into the main cast, making Penny the female character with the most screen time. As The Big Bang Theory progressed and the viewers got to grow with the characters, Penny’s transformation became one of the best on the show. Watching her go from the girl next door to the one everyone goes to for advice throughout the course of the show’s 12 seasons. While some of the show’s biggest catchphrases often come from Sheldon, Penny is another character with some of the most memorable lines. Her thinly veiled insults are often covered by calling that person “Sweetie.” Sometimes she makes quips about the guys right to their faces because they genuinely have no idea what she’s talking about since they are so swept up in their own worlds. Nevertheless, Penny’s lines should not be forgotten.

(Sheldon knocks on Penny’s door three times)
Penny: “Who do we love?”
Sheldon: “Penny.” (Knocks 3 times)
Penny: “Who do we love?”
Sheldon: “Penny.” (Knocks 3 times)
Penny: “Who do we love?”
Sheldon: “Penny.” (5×10 – The Flaming Spittoon Acquisition)

(3×17 – The Precious Fragmentation)

Leonard: “Oh, a gift certificate for motorcycle lessons. Very thoughtful.”
Penny: “Yeah, and I checked. Not letting the bike fall on you while standing still is lesson one.” (2×11 – The Bath Item Gift Hypothesis)

(7×23 – The Gorilla Dissolution)

Penny: “Oh, I didn’t tell you? You’re banished from the Cheesecake Factory.”
Sheldon: “Why?”
Penny: “Well, you have three strikes. One, coming in. Two, sitting down. And three, I don’t like your attitude.” (2×7 – The Panty Pinata Polarization)

(11×9 – The Bitcoin Entanglement)

Sheldon: “Now remember, you were given powerful pain medication and a muscle relaxer, so don’t operate heavy machinery, and try not to choke on your own drool.”
Sheldon is about to leave.
Penny: “Wait! You have to help me get into bed. (laughs) “Sheldon has to help me get into bed”. Bet you thought I’d never say that!”
Sheldon: “Yes. Charmed. Your drug-addled candor knows no bounds.”
Sheldon follows her to her room after shutting the door. He pulls down the covers to help Penny into bed.
Penny: “You know people think you are this weird robot man who’s so annoying all the time and you totally are. But then it’s like that movie Wall-E at the end. You’re so full of love and you can save a plant and get fat people out of their floaty chairs.”
Sheldon: “That’s a fairly labored metaphor but I appreciate the sentiment behind it.”
Penny: “Sing ‘Soft Kitty’ to me.”
Sheldon: “‘Soft kitty’ is for when you’re sick, you’re not sick.”
Penny: “Injured and drugged is a kind of sick.”
Sheldon: (sitting on the bed next to her) “Soft Kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur…”
Penny: “Wait wait. Let’s sing it as a round. I’ll start. Soft Kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur…” Sheldon doesn’t join in.
Penny: “So that is when you come in. I’ll start over. Soft Kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur…” Still nothing from Sheldon.
Penny: “I’ve got all night Sheldon.” She starts again.
Penny: “Soft Kitty, warm kitty…”
Sheldon: “Soft Kitty, warm kitty…” They both sing the entire song together. (3×8 – The Adhesive Duck Deficiency)

(6×3 – The Higgs Boson Observation)

Penny: “Oh, anyways I’m also writing a screenplay. It’s about this sensitive girl who comes to LA from Lincoln, Nebraska, to be an actress and who ends up a waitress at the cheesecake factory.”
Leonard: “So it’s based on your life?”
Penny: “No, I’m from Omaha!” (1×1 – Pilot)

(9×1 – The Matrimonial Momentum)

Penny: “Leonard, Howard, and Raj, they aren’t like other guys. They’re special.”
Alicia: “Okay, they’re special, and?”
Penny: “Well let’s see how can I explain this. Um. They don’t know how to use their shields.”
Alicia: “Shields?”
Penny: “Yeah. You know like in Star Trek and you’re in battle, and you raise the shields.”
Realizing what she said “Where the hell did that come from?” (2×19 – The Dead Hooker Juxtaposition)

(6×21 – The Closure Alternative)

Penny: “Since when do we offer one day rush?”
Leonard: “Amazon offers a one-day rush.”
Penny: “Yeah, but they don’t have to glue the books together!” (2×18 – The Work Song Nanocluster)

(8×17 – The Colonization Application)

Penny: “I’m a little low on cash.”
Leonard: “How much you got?”
Penny: “Nothing.”
Leonard: “How can you walk around with no money?”
Penny: “I’m cute, I get by.” (4×2 – The Cruciferous Vegetable Amplification)

(7×6 – The Romance Resonance)

Penny: “And remember, he’s more afraid of you than you are of him.”
Sheldon: “That doesn’t help.”
Penny: “No, I was talking to the bird.” (5×9 – The Ornithophobia Diffusion)

(4×14 – The Thespian Catalyst)

Penny: “Hey, what are you guys doing here?”
Howard: “We’re grown men, we drink at bars.”
Penny: “No and no. Everything okay with you and Bernadette?”
Howard: “Oh yeah, sure.”
Penny: “You and Amy? Good?”
Sheldon: “Oh, better than good.”
Penny: “You know those girls text me every detail of their lives as it happens.” (5×16 – The Vacation Solution)

(1×7 – The Dumpling Paradox)

Leonard: “It’s hard sometimes. Everywhere you go, guys hit on you, even if I’m standing right there. And they’re all taller than me. Why is everyone taller than me? You know what, this is all in my head. It’s my problem, not yours.”
Penny: “Leonard, why do you always do this? Listen to me, you’re the one I’m with. You know I love you. So will you please relax, because you’re driving me crazy.”
Leonard: “You know that’s the first time you ever said you love me.”
Penny:
“Yeah.”
Leonard:
“We’re just supposed to pretend it’s not a big deal?”
Penny:
“That’s exactly what we’re gonna do because you’re about to make me cry. And we both know if I start crying, you’re gonna start crying.”
Leonard: “You’re right, I should go.” (6×8 – The 43 Peculiarity)

(3×3 – The Gothowitz Deviation)

Penny: “I can’t believe it. if I hadn’t been working the dinner shift, I would’ve run right into the robbers.”
Leonard: “Hey, there’s no reason for you to be scared.”
Penny: “I’m not scared. I would’ve gone all Nebraska on their asses.” (3×13 – The Bozeman Reaction)

(11×22 – The Monetary Insufficiency)

Penny: “Oh, please. When I first met you, you were incapable of touching another human being. Now you’re holding hands, going on dates, you even made out with her on a train.”
Sheldon: “She told you?”
Penny: “Of course, she told me. It’s the most interesting thing that’s ever happened to her in her entire life.” (7×16 – The Table Polarization)

(12×24 – The Stockholm Syndrome)

Leonard: “This tray contains clues as to what you and I are going to be doing on Valentine’s Day.”
Penny: “Oh, wow. Okay. Let’s see. We’ve got milk chocolate, Swiss cheese, and fondue.
My lactose-intolerant boyfriend is going to eat all this, then I’m going to climb on his back and rocket to the moon?” (3×15 – The Large Hadron Collision)

(3×14 – The Einstein Approximation)

Penny: “What are you doing back?”
Leonard: “We got a flat and couldn’t get the tire off.”
Penny: “Oh, I’m sorry.”
Leonard: “Thank you.”
Penny: “If it makes you feel any better, I pierced Amy’s ears and her mom made her sit in my closet.”
Sheldon: “We blew up Feynman’s van.”
Penny: “My dad killed my pig with his tractor.”
Leonard: “I spent the night in Mexico with Sheldon.”
Penny: “You win.” (9×3 – The Bachelor Party Corrosion)

(10×2 – The Military Miniaturization)

Penny: “So what’s going on?”
Sheldon: “I don’t know. I looked around the room, and I saw all the faces and the presents, and it, it was just too much.”
Penny: “I get that. Hey, you want to just bring a few people in here? You know, Wil Wheaton in the bathtub, Batman on the toilet. It’ll be like the weirdest Comic-Con ever.” (9×17 – The Celebration Experimentation)

(3×17 – The Precious Fragmentation)

Penny: “Wow. Okay. Well, um, how about this? Maybe while you’re still in town, Leonard and I could have another small ceremony. You know, if you’re interested.”
Beverly: “I would find that perfectly acceptable.”
Penny: “She would find it perfectly acceptable. You guys saw it. We bonded!” (9×23 – The Line Substitution Solution)

(6×6 – The Extract Obliteration)

Penny: “Oh, my God, Howard. That’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard. And it came out of you.” (5×22 – The Stag Convergence)

(3×20 – The Spaghetti Catalyst)

Penny: “Are you getting sick?”
Sheldon: “Of course not. I’m too busy to be sick.”
Penny: “Well, you’re pretty delicate. Maybe you shouldn’t be pushing yourself so hard.”
Sheldon: “I’m fine.”
Penny: “All right. We’ll just pretend that you didn’t catch a cold watching Frozen.”
Sheldon: “That didn’t happen.”
Penny: “You also got a nosebleed watching Up.” (10×20 – The Recollection Dissipation)

(12×23 – The Change Constant)

Penny: “Ah, I feel just like Mother Teresa. Except for the virgin part. That ship sailed a long time ago.”
Bernadette: “I think Mother Teresa would have washed the clothes first.”
Penny: “Yeah, well, I bet her laundry room wasn’t down five flights of stairs. You know, giving really is better than receiving. I used to think it was such a cliché, but it seems to be the… oh, look at these cute jeans someone just threw away.”
Bernadette: “Donated.”
Penny: “Yes, to a poor waitress who loves a boot cut.” (5×11 – The Speckerman Recurrence)

(6×23 – The Love Spell Potential)

Leonard: “So, who’s Stan Lee?”
Penny: “Um, he was on Star Trek.”
Leonard: “Nope.”
Penny: “Star Wars?”
Leonard: “No.”
Penny: “Um, uh, Stan Lee, oh, he was in those goofy kung fu movies you love so much?”
Leonard: “That’s Bruce Lee.”
Penny: “Oh. So, is this Bruce Lee’s nerdy brother, Stan?” (3×16 – The Excelsior Acquisition)

(5×7 – The Good Guy Fluctuation)

Leonard: “I’m sorry. I- I crossed a line. I didn’t mean to!”
Penny: “Who says something like that right in the middle of sex?”
Leonard: “I don’t know, it just came out. People say weird things during sex all the time.”
Penny: “Okay, well, they sure as hell don’t say that.”
Leonard: “It was the heat of the moment.”
Penny: “No, the heat of the moment is, ooh, yeah, just like that, not will you marry me?”
Leonard: “I’m sorry. Just, just give me another chance.”
Penny: “Why, so you can crawl under the covers and go, hey, baby, want to go look for houses in neighborhoods with good schools?” (5×23 – The Launch Acceleration)

(6×13 – The Bakersfield Expedition)

Penny: “Here, drink this. It might help.”
Leonard: “What if it doesn’t?”
Penny: “Well, that’s why I brought the bottle.” (11×2 – The Retraction Reaction)

(7×8 – The Itchy Brain Simulation)

Penny: “Oh, uh, hey, Beverly, you called my phone, not Leonard’s.”
Beverly Hofstadter: “Actually, I was hoping to speak with you. Is this a good time?”
Penny: “Uh, that depends. What time is it where you are?”
Beverly Hofstadter: “Uh, just after 5:00.”
Penny: (clears throat, and swaps fruit juice for a bottle of wine) “Yeah, that counts.” (11×4 – The Explosion Implosion)

(2×3 – The Barbarian Sublimation)

Leonard: “And Amy’s your best friend. I’m sure she’ll come to her senses and pick you.”
Penny: “Okay, she’s not my best friend. We’re not 12. If she wants Bernadette to be her maid of honor, I really don’t care.”
Leonard: “Sounds like you care.”
Penny: “No, I mean, it-it’s just annoying. You know, we talk every day. We see each other all the time. She’s always there for me, and basically– oh, my God, Amy’s my best friend.
Leonard: “You okay?”
Penny: “No, my best friend didn’t ask me to be her maid of honor. I’m pissed!” (11×12 – The Matrimonial Metric)

(3×22 – The Staircase Implementation)

Thank you for visiting my blog and reading today’s post and this week’s edition of The Big Bang Theory quotes featuring the one and only…Penny! I hope you all have a lovely week, for now though I shall see you next time.

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